the f’ing hard work of being human

After today’s old-story news, I’m up late, thinking and writing and thought I’d share a little. Thank you for gifting your gaze and presence here. I hope you feel my insomniac-acal love:

How we live and how we treat one another–especially those we disagree with or cannot relate to–is “the work” we must do and work HARD at to create the new world we believe in. It is fu*#ing HARD work, like this fern that embedded in the human-made stone step, finding/making a way to live/thrive within the system he sprouted upon… a Rock system seemingly designed to deter Fern.

Fern is not denying the rock: Fern is nestled and sustained by the rock that for a spell of time did not offer support or cracks for Fern to grow. But look at Fern now. Look at Rock. Hmmm.

There are so many cracks around us to thrive–so many opportunities for us to serve and love people who are suffering and hurting and fearful.

Some nights I cannot sleep because of my awareness of collective human pain and fear, and my heart wanting to love upon people and contribute somehow to healing.

Like tonight.

But for now, I say good night. I pray for our entire earth and our residents, our species, this country that I live in and love so specially. And tomorrow I will love on someone and find a way to reduce someone’s suffering–if only for a fleeting moment–because that is the only thing I can somewhat control–MY presence and MY actions.

nightynight dear one xo
bjs

Enter your email address to follow this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email.

great work of our time

img_2486

love is everywhere (photo of tiny heart we found concrete path outside my son’s school)

“The Great Work of our time is to carry out the transition from the current period where humans are a destructive presence on the Earth, to one where the human presence is mutually beneficial to the planet and the entire community of life—a mutually enhancing human/earth relationship. To do this we need to undergo, at both an individual and collective level, a fundamental transformation – a virtual reinvention of what we consider the role of human beings to be. ” ~Thomas Berry

❤ becky

what am i willing to die for?

img_0105

When I think about the water protectors and the sacred work they are doing to protect the land and river and our future humans, I am inspired yet simultaneously perplexed by their willingness to die for this cause. These incredible humans are willing to be present in body, mind and spirit in prayer and peace knowing well they may be harmed by rubber bullets, concussion granades and other various human-made intentional suffering devices. They are willing to face arrest and to be crated in dog cages, to suffer and potentially die at the hands of a system and–let me remind myself–at the hands of OTHER HUMANS: A system and humans that not only devalues, disrespects and disregards their beliefs and basic needs, but intentionally inflicts horrific suffering upon them, to try to stop them.

The now thousands of mostly peaceful people in North Dakota–men, women, and children–these humans are prepared to die to stop the rape, monetization and exploitation of Mother Earth, willing to let their lives end in the name of ending the DAPL and our collective addiction to oil.

(I find it funny but not ironic that wordpress and facebook thinks monetization is misspelled, but at least it suggests “demonetization”… that is something!)

I am so grateful for their known suffering and–coincidental intentional prayerful–optimism. (I pray for the suffering to stop.) I honor our brothers and sisters in North Dakota–and all around the world–us humans who are done with the old story. Those of us who are willing to go with less of our physical desires met. I honor this complicated time we are living between stories; old story of greed and take and oppression and separateness, and the possibility of new story of sharing, giving and celebrating each other for all our unique expressions of humanity, and unity.

I don’t have answers but I am willing to go with much less (and endure intentional suffering) so my grandchildren can have enough.

I am ready to use human intention and creativity to bring in the NEW story. I want to serve (and listen, learn and love) however I can.

The Water Protectors’ tenacity, courage and conviction leads me to ask myself–and perhaps you too–: What am I willing to die for? What do I believe in so much that I would risk making my children motherless?

Perhaps until I can fully answer these questions, I am not truly living or fully alive?!

 

just thinking and questioning with you. with all my ❤
becky

water (oil?) is life

img_2407

Dear Ones,

In Raleigh, North Carolina yesterday, a couple hundred of us local Water Protectors went to steps of Wells Fargo building downtown, to peacefully share the message in English, Cherokee and Navajo: Water is Life. It felt good to stand physically–should to shoulder, heart to heart–with so many strangers who are committed to being a voice for those on the front line protecting the water, in ND. I have been shooting love canons through my site here and on Facebook, but to actually use my body felt powerful.

While our connections and stance felt good, it also felt very bad. I had to deal with my own hypocrisy and nausea: driving my fossil-fueled minivan there, and protesting and standing in front of a company that bought my house for my family, I owe mega bucks for my home mortgage. I strive to not contribute to the problems, but me– like practically EVERYONE– I am stuck in this system of our old story.

I felt sadness for the workers coming out. For some of them, today may have been the first time they heard about how their company was involved in funding DAPL.

I know in my heart and entire being, that we are ALL in this together. While Water IS Life, I know that most of us are bound by our dependencies to oil. It fuels our lifestyles, the way water fuels our bodies. While I believe this is the situation right now, I do NOT believe there is nothing that we can do about it.

I pray for greed, fear and the myth of separation to be washed away by love and sacred listening. I write about the injustice and plight in ND and the Sioux and perhaps ya’ll are perplexed by how an immigrant from England could care so much… but I do. If you ever want to talk about it, please reach out, don’t silently carry your curiosity… I am here to lovingly and peacefully share the situation and my heart. And in turn to listen to you.

I pray for us all, that we realize that ND represents every single duality of our America, from racism, elitism, greed, putting profit over people’s and Mama Earth’s health… and countless civil liberty violations. I pray for the new America to come peacefully now, and for intentional human suffering to end. I pray.

Thank you for reading and hearing me. And our Native aAmerican brothers and sisters say, Thank you for being.

knowing and believing a better new story is coming…

#NoDAPL #WaterIsLife #StandingWithStandingRock #MediaWhiteOut #wellsfargo

mothering is democracy

dsc_0547

I took my teenage daughters to school this morning (Sonshine is home, sick), just a few minutes after learning the news of our new president from the radio. As a family we have been preparing for Mr. Trump for many months, but it still was a shock.

Months ago I vehemently considered moving my family to England, as a British national I have that right. But that was before I more deeply explored what living in this country means to me, and the possibility America affords, and also what it means to live democracy on a daily basis, democracy as an act I consciously contribute to… daily.

We have talked about what democracy is, what it aspires to be, and that an election is only one way democracy attempts itself.

This morning, on the drive we talked about it some more. I told them that today is a day for listening, and that deep listening is a democratic act.

Then we talked about our prayers. We can act in our power by choosing to pray for humility to wash over Mr. Trump. That we should be thankful so many of his warts, flaws and fears are transparent. And that we as a country, can help heal him and all us with similar hidden and outward expressions of fear (racism, elitism, bullying, etc.) by using our love and deep listening to the pain, and of course our individual and collaborative creativity.

Then I felt a panic feeling come over me, dropping them off at the door, questioning (in my heart) their safety at school… well anywhere really. I reasoned with myself: Dropping the children off at school today is a democratic act. Mothering (and fathering) is a democratic act.

We shall overcome. One foot in front of the other. Breathing. Listening. Hurting. Learning. Forgiving. Remembering that people and countries can and do change. Continuing on. Loving forward. We will make this new story, together.

(photo of our daughters standing in front of Abe Lincoln memorial, on the very spot where Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr loved into being our “I Have a Dream” speech.)

❤ becky